Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Dont Judge

Your kitchen too would look like this if an intruder decided to invade your home.

Don't freak out.

We weren't robbed.... Your so dramatic. Why in the world would a burglar upturn the oven? I don't hide my none-existent gems and diamonds under the stove, although that would be genius. Genius, before I blasted out my newly discovered secret hiding location on the web.

It wasn't a vandalizer or a thief, instead it was a dirty, stinky little house mouse. Although he didn't have intentions of taking off with our goods, I still feel violated by his mere presence. Khage on the other hand wanted to keep him. We met in the middle: releasing him near the wash by our house.

Tell me this? Should I be worried about my cleanliness if a mouse chose this particular place to pillage? Originally, I thought of myself as a clean person. I sweep multiple times a day and frantically wipedown the counters just about everytime I come into the kitchen. Seems I'm gonna need to step up my game to ward off future intruders... after all he knows where we live.

And don't worry about the toddler completely unsupervised on the counter... pretend the floor below her is scattered with pillows. It wasn't. But pretend. If the fictitious pillow safety feature isn't enough for you, Daddys in the diving with a 50 50 chance of catching her range. Believe dat.

Thursday, December 18, 2014

Halloween 2014

I'm going to ask you to ignore the date today. Pretend like were pals and do me this solid. It is a week before Christmas and less then three weeks before the new year... that computes to a hearty seven weeks too late for this post. All is fair in love and laziness.

I had such plans for this Halloween. Khage was gonna be a cowboy... a rumblin tumblin child of the West, complete with homemade vest and chaps....

Then he saw an Optimus Prime costume. So I did what any mother would do, I tried to bribe him. I attempted to lure him over with talk of guns and a holster, but that boy cant be bought. He wants what he wants, and boy wants to be Optimus.

Do you see the look in his eyes? That doesn't come with the costume my friends, that's all Khage getting deep into the character. Once the mask went on, he transformed (eh? eh?) into a whole new guy. So much in fact he sometimes referred to me by my first name.
Jamee, will you roll my sleeves please? 
Jamee, can you help me put on my mask?
Thank you, Jamee.
At least his character maintained a constant state of politeness.

Harlyn's costume was also incredibly store bought, but one which we already had on hand. I pulled it out of her closet and said to her wanna be a chicken and she just continued to blank stare at me for an uncomfortable amount of time... I happily took that as a yes. I have always wanted my kids to share a costume. Have the one costume that no matter what they all wore it at least once. Then later I could look back and play a little game of who wore it better.

Your right, that is weird.

Enter chicken costume round two. Remember round one?

Maybe next year I will get around to posting Halloween pictures while not conjunctionally shopping online for Christmas gifts. Let us add that to my endless list of resolutions that will never be fulfilled. Just squeeze it onto the list... maybe before Make Khage and Harlyn wear coordinating costumes but after Convince Brad to dress up as the Phantom of the Opera. Oh how that Phantom has wooed me.

Happy Halloween friends.

You agreed to fudge on today's date remember?